Seeking a reliable, self-sufficient roommate for a unique rental unit. The apartment is structurally sound, though spatially challenging. Key features include a central stairwell that, upon ascent, resolves into a horizontal plane—a perpetual, non-directional drift. The main living area maintains standard dimensions, but the kitchen is located entirely within the fourth spatial axis, accessible only by turning the brass dial in the pantry. Use of the sink requires careful calibration; water pressure behaves according to the local curvature. Ideal candidate is someone who views geometry as a suggestion rather than a law. Must be comfortable with the concept of time being merely a suggestion of direction. Utilities and local transit are included. First month’s rent is negotiable based on your tolerance for ontological ambiguity.
draft · uneasy